Ever do a lot of thinking. Cerebrum explosion thinking. And about more than just love, which is odd for me. I’m always thinking about that emotion – I think we all know that. I’ve had small conversations on the mind. And Muse Lyrics. Then I go back to the Postal Service – the band, is it really a government agency? Cause I think about that as well… I’ve been wanting to write a book of poetry. I’ve been wanted by crazy salsa dancers. (I did look really cute, who can blame them?!) I just woke up from strange dreaming. – when am I ever not dreaming strangely? You know I wrote an entire blog entry – also just deleted the whole thing. I’ve been pondering words, reading the dictionary, and I use tons of words that I understand but exact meanings? My mind is a sieve. Maybe more of a filter…
Did you know ‘love’ is a gothic term? (At least in my dictionary it is.) 1. a deep and tender feeling of affection for or attachment or devotion to a person or persons. There is more – an expression; brotherhood; objects of; unusual passion; sex; Venus; tennis score; and God.
I like it. It’s a good word. In Spanish there are a lot of words for one thing. This is one word for a whole lot of things…

I like it when people use words that don’t seem to belong – but the expression, always perfect.

There is a song my mother has played me – Quisera ser un pez. (I hope I spelled that right???) Basicly it translates into ‘I want to be a fish.’ He proceeds to sing to his girl. ‘So I can press my nose up against the glass in your fish tank. So I can make googly faces at you whenever I want. Oh oh oh, and spend the entire night “mojado en ti.” It means wet in you – but it doesn’t…. it means soaked in you, bathed in your presence, immersed in everything you are, overcome and overwhelmed by you – surrounded.
now how do add this song here......*oi*

my parents are starting to complain about my habits.

computer. phone. music. phone. internet. walking at night. music. phone.

siblings are starting to complain about their *used to be cool* older sister.

i'm also not happy with myself.
*but* in my defense : The doctors I have don't want me to do anything till March? I do all I can to waste time. (Don't knock it till you've tried it) I sew. I sleep. I plan. I volunteer. I clean. I'm also the go between for this family. I obsess. I color in and out of the lines. I research. I read the dictionary when I'm not actually in the throws of another book. (I'm looking for Fantasies of a Young Submissive right now.)

I was compleatly off in orbit for a year, space was nice - but it's lonely. Even before that - There was all that training I went through and you don't focus on what's going on - on the rest of the planet.

You just think about space.

I'm saving the drops of Jupiter.

Interstellar travel is always hardest for the people you leave behind. They worry. But I'm back! Better than ever!
I'm available for talk shows and autographs now. Just waiting for those phone calls.

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Pyrallis: hi honey! sorry can't talk now, gotta feed homeless people
Pyrallis is away at 5:28 P.M.

*woo hoo*

Yesterday I went out salsa dancing. I went with *Ron*, *Brittany*, and *Nickie* - (I hope I've spelled everyone's name correctly.)

Though we were the whitest people there - we danced and had fun. I actually danced not just kept to my voyeuristic ways. *Brittany* (who for some odd reason seems to prefer to be called *Chase* - her last name - though I do kinda think *Chase* sounds more interesting) - yes *Brittany* was teaching us all to dance. For X-mas I'm giving her a crop and whip. She's such the Dom. We're also going to the Castle together. I don't know if *Nickie* is coming but - *Ron* and *Meagan* want to come with. So does *John*. $10.oo just for parking..... but I love costuming and some people really go all out for this club. I'm thinking small disposable camera. I need a small digital. WELL TO DAMN BAD - *ha!*

and yes - I got asked to dance by some crazy little spanish insanity case. I did dance with him. And NO - we did not exchange phone numbers. Did I mention before the got to see National Treasure? and I'm anxiously waiting for to see Finding Neverland...... I love Nick Cage. I love Johnny Depp even more.
You know 'Gone in 60 Seconds' doesn't really ring my bell at first toll - but then I watched it... Angelina and Nick... I really enjoy that movie...

I realize I am the babble queen - on Thursday I'm suppose to go see MUSE with *Chase*. I adore dressing up so this should be awesome.

My children - I'm bored. I realize this is my fault. I want to go back to school because I want to learn. Some people have quite the feelings of hate for that establishment. I, on the other hand, do not. *grin* Granted - just because you go to school doesn't mean you'll learn everything - but I'm setting out to, just the same.