okay.... GO!

I just dicovered Radio AOL - even Christian might like it concidering the station I'm listening to has played well over 50% of his posted music. Ryan, if he found some way to get his music on there would be a favorite. Easy.
After I voted, I went to the library. I voted, it's called an absente ballot people! I'm going to be in Chicago for the primary. Anthony, yes I looked them up and tried to find out where they stand on "the issues." What I decided will now be voted on by the rest of my family. No one else wanted to look anything up, so they vote'n who I want them to vote for. All six of them.
At the library of course one book came to the brain. Candyfreak. Duh. Per chance the St. Cloud library had a copy. Yes, I'm addicted to sugar. After reading the first couple chapters... so what??? So far... I like the book...
My mother bought me a belt. I never understood these devices that are meant to keep your pants up. I never wanted to. Can't you just wear pants that fit? Now that I'm thin enough to wear shirts slightly smaller, slightly shorter, slightly sexier, I realize belt and braclets are my new needed fashion must. I don't like belt loops without a little color inbetween. I still think people should just wear pants that fit - but...
I've also started to look at belt buckles - I still have to do more research on these foreign objects. They excite and fill me with wonder... it's kinda scary.
My mother also bought me a watch. It's not MINE, but I'm going to have to pay for my own $100 happiness. It is 'sorta' like my digital dream. But it was $15... she was okay with paying that and it's got three different bands - fantastic. Plus I can sew my own if I get tired of those!
I'm wearing a necklace with a bead from the ones I stole? from Jeremy's. CONSTANTLY. I'll be wearing it to Chicago. I wrote about these beads before. It, the bead, reminds me of when I used to go to film festivals, when I used to 'hang out' with people who I always knew had something to say. It reminds me of NASA and crashed rockets, sitting in cookies, Ryan getting drunk. I felt like I was a part of something fucking spectacular. It reminds me of all the Queequeg boys.
I can't believe the way I look - I can't even remember when I was 154 lbs. AND I don't look swollen. I feel great. Lonely but great. Even my hair looks cute and punky. I've been getting looks. ME! From not just any guys but cute ones! Okay so you have the occ. child molester but that's any girl... Before I started going out with Ry, I was told that I looked like I'd bite a guys head off if he started talking to me... I hope I don't do that now...
I'm trying to smile - all the time - Trying... you never know who's falling in love with it.